Linden Joshua

Linden Joshua, the newest member of our family, expected in March.

First of all, both Linden and Joshua are trees. This wasn't intentional but it is meaningful. Trees are useful and beautiful. In the Bible trees can be symbolic of people and our church is called "The Grove" (Linden Joshua should fit in fabulously).

Linden: We gave both of our first two children "L" names, not because I wanted their names to both start with "L" but because our two favorite names just happened to both start with the same letter. It wasn't until I was pregnant with my third that I realized he would have to have an "L" name as well or be the odd one out. Linden is my maiden name and therefore we want for him the ingenuity and commitment to family I can see throughout my family. He'll hopefully have my grandpa's sweetness, humility, and humor. Linden trees offer an abundance of benefits and valuable qualities. I like that the leaves of many species are heart-shaped. The tree bears fruit and both fruit and flowers have edible uses. We pray that our Linden will bear much fruit and that it will be to the glory of God and nourish others. The Linden tree fruit has a chocolatey flavor and can be used as both a coffee and chocolate substitute . . . . this is not pertinent to the name discussion, but I really love it! The tree lives a very long time and provides deep shade and protection. Covering and protection are desirable qualities for a man. The wood has great acoustic properties and is popular for making instruments. It is also a top choice for blinds and shutters because it is strong and stable but also lightweight. The flowers contain antioxidants and the medicinal uses of the Linden are profuse, including - treatment of restlessness, migraines, inflammation, colds, cough, fever, infection, high blood pressure, indigestion, and more! All of that to say, this is one valuable and useful tree! We want Linden, the person, to be valuable and useful; and maybe even bring healing, comfort, music, and something yummy to those around him!

Joshua: According to my baby name book, Joshua means "God is my salvation." When looking for a Biblical name to pair with Linden, we were surveying both meaning and how it sounded as the middle name. Joshua feared God and was a great leader. He learned from and served Moses. He, along with Caleb, spied out the promised land and returned with a good report, trusting in God over man. When Moses handed the torch off to Joshua he said, "The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you." After the death of Moses, the Lord commissioned Joshua in the first chapter of book of Joshua and told him that he was to lead the people into the promised land, that strength and courage would be paramount, and to know His word and to "be careful to do according to all that it is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous and then you will have success." The charges, promises, and intimacy seen in Joshua's walk with God are incredible. Later Joshua proves his commitment to God's ways as he leads the people in bringing down the walls of Jericho simply by marching. I want all my children to be teachable and humble, to fear God over man, to have Joshua's level of confidence in God and commitment to His word, and to have success in God's eyes.

Joshua trees have deep and extensive root systems, reaching up to 36 feet from the tree. They must survive desert conditions and yet can live for hundreds of years. The trees were used by Native Americans for weaving and food purposes. Here's to deep roots, heartiness, and long life for our Linden Joshua!

Alternate Blog Titles

Mud, Sweat, and Fears. Mud, Sweat, and Tears. Mud, Sweat, and Beers. Any of these would occasionally be applicable blog titles. The only other title that would really fit more often than not would have been, Home Wasn't Built In A Day.

I am looking to build something great here; not just in my children, but in our family as a whole, our traditions, our home, everything . . . . everything I do revolves around ultimate goals for children, family, home, and self. Some days I expect my house to be perfectly clean and organized, myself to be full of wisdom and patience for each situation, my children to be totally on top of everything I think they should know in thought and behavior. On these days I get discouraged by the fact that we are all far from perfect and my house is a disaster. These tend to be the tears or beers days! Sometimes it can be hard to remember that if I'm building something great, I can't expect it to be built overnight.

God says, "by wisdom a house is built and by understanding it is established." He also says that He will complete the good work he has started in me. I have to see this all as a journey, a work in progress. I am a work in progress, not yet the person, wife, and mother I hope to become. My kids are a work in progress. This home and the traditions, routines, and celebrations we will practice in it is constantly evolving. God is the Author and Perfecter of my faith; He started this whole deal and it is on His shoulders to finish it. Rome was grand and it wasn't built in a day. I have big dreams for my children and for their education. I want depth. I want quality. I need patience. I need to be faithful in the little things day by day and not allow myself to be overwhelmed by the big picture. I cannot expect perfection from myself or my kids.

When I was fresh out of college and interviewing for teaching jobs, I used to say things like, "learning is a journey not a destination," and back it up with the sentiment that if I could inspire in students a love of learning and equip them with the skills needed to pursue it, this would be success. I find it pretty amazing that a principal hired me. I think my idealism inspired her a little. My idea of success was squashed under big textbooks and lists of standards, but now as I consider starting my career as an educator all over again here in my own home, it's finding some room to breathe and maybe even triumph over fears, doubts, and comparisons. If I am to believe that learning is a journey and if I want my kids to be on this journey for a lifetime then I need grace, perspective, diligence, and patience, always patience! They will not suddenly begin learning at age five and I do not want them to stop at 18 or 22. We are all works in progress! A work in progress doesn't look pretty at every stage and while the ugly days frustrate me, the Creator of the work always has the finished product in mind and knows what He is doing.

Apple Seeds

I wasn't planning on writing tonight. We spent the first half of the day running errands, met a friend for lunch, came home, put everything away and did some painting, and from there it became a very lazy day. I was tired. My two-year-old never napped and throughout the day, uncharacteristically, made at least six big potty, paint, or food messes. I planned on making it through the afternoon and then envisioned the little one asleep by six (the lack of nap paying off) and the bigger one out an hour later; I'd have a little time to myself and hit the sack not far behind them. In that hour of time I had alone with my four-year-old great things happened and that is why I'm taking a few moments to write. I feel encouraged and that's worth making a note of and remembering.

We read a couple of books and then started reading some rhymes. One was about a "spike of green," that "no one else had ever seen," a newly sprouted seed. Luke asked if we could plant some seeds. I replied that yes we could, in the spring and explained that fall was not a good time for new seeds. He then had the grand idea that we should plant some in a cup in the house to avoid the cooler weather. I told him he was very smart, yawned and leaned back into the couch, and added that we could do that "sometime soon; I don't have any seeds right now." He was quiet for a minute and then said, "we could cut up an apple and get seeds." I was comfortable, lazy, tired, and had not had any intention of doing anything but how could I resist that? So, we had this wonderful evening learning activity. We cut up the apple, found the seeds, found some good dirt, and then researched growing apple seeds. We found out our seeds won't be ready for dirt for about a month and set them on the window sill to dry. The kid wants to learn and his brain is working well! I'm encouraged!

School hasn't always looked how it looks now in modern day America. The basic structure of public school as we know it had its beginnings right around the time of the Industrial Revolution and details have been changing almost constantly ever since. Generations and generations were educated in various other ways. And although there are many interesting tidbits to be gleaned by looking at education throughout history, age is my focus today.

The ancient Orthodox Jews did not begin formal schooling until age 12 or 13. This age happens to coincide with Piaget's findings (centuries later) on cognitive maturity. My parents started public school at age five, so did I, so do today's kindergartners, but things sure have changed. It wasn't that long ago that kindergarten was not viewed as an academic year. It was much more about play and arts and time with other kids, and I'm pretty sure the "Kindergarten Curriculum Contents" guide was not 81 pages long. In my own life time I have watched the formal teaching of reading, writing, and math skills get pushed down earlier and earlier in the public school classrooms. In my observations and research I do not see that the students are any better off for such an early push (and if anything worse off).

One of my college papers was on Vygotsky and the the importance of play to the overall brain development of a young child. In college education courses I had to research and articulate my thoughts on education. Recently I went out to our shed in hopes of finding some of the papers I wrote back then. I know that many of my beliefs haven't changed over the years and I could really use some of that studied, researched thought I put into those papers right about now. Sadly, the attrition rate, due mostly to rats and goats, has been pretty high in the shed. I couldn't find any of my old papers. I'm really mourning the loss because there was some good stuff there . . . . some jump-through-the-hoops-and-get-the-assignment-done stuff also but there were a couple of papers I remember vividly and very much wanted to re-read. I wish I had the paper in front of me right now, but I know that Vygotsky showed very powerfully how children need play, specifically imaginative play and interaction with people at different stages of development for optimal learning. When young children miss out on play time, their future cognitive development is affected. The things I researched and wrote about in college ring true to what I want for my own children. My goals of where I expected to see these things play out are what have changed. At that time I naively pictured myself spending the better part of my life teaching in a public school classroom. Today, I'm trying to come up with a picture of how it will all look in my own home.

Gatto says that if taught at the right time, basic reading, writing, and arithmetic can be learned in less than 100 hours. A leader at a seminar I attended said, "we expect our six-year-olds to sit in their seats for eight hours and tell our teenagers to go play." Now this is exaggerated, but the point struck me. I will expect my kids to be serious studiers but I do not see starting out that way. We will, and are, starting out with some academics but our kindergarten year will probably look much more like my parents' kindergarten year and much less like that of my son's peers. There is some fear in me here because I have a feeling that if you compare my son to other five, six, and seven-year-olds he will seem to be behind. However, I hope and believe that at age 12, 18, and beyond he will shine.

“I am struck by the fact that the more slowly trees grow at first, the sounder they are at the core, and I think that the same is true of human beings. We do not wish to see children precocious, making great strides in their early years like sprouts, producing a soft and perishable timber, but better if they expand slowly at first, as if contending with difficulties, and so are solidified and perfected. Such trees continue to expand with nearly equal rapidity to extreme old age.”
Henry David Thoreau

Pros & Cons

PROS:
1) I know my kids better than anyone else. I know their strengths, weaknesses, learning styles, and biggest motivators and can meet their needs at a much better ratio than the 25:1 of a classroom.
2) Who they're with - Socialization and learning benefit by mixed age groups. I play a big part in who is an influence or role model.
3) DO what we're studying - hands-on, nature, community, museums, etc.
4) Implement methods, curriculum, philosophies I am excited about and believe will work best for our family. I have been inspired by some pretty amazing educators, writers, and homeschooling parents. I want to attempt to put all of this inspiration into action and not settle for less than what could maybe be the best! (Upcoming posts to address some of these to help me figure out exactly what putting it all into action might look like!)
5) Reading Gatto has turned me off of traditional schools for a variety of reasons. (Pink Floyd now playing in the background, "we don't need no education . . . . all in all you're just another brick in the wall.")
6) Lack of schooling options near our home that excite me, drive and money to do anything else.

CONS:
1) It's already really hard work and I haven't technically even started yet.
2) Kid feels like he's missing out on something. I would love for him to get certain parts of school and as he gets older I will definitely need to cover some subjects through either outside classes or tutoring/mentoring. For the time being and through the primary years, I suppose we'll do outside enrichment classes, but I wish they were all grouped together and included some play time.
3) It is very possible that I will actually go crazy . . . . pretty much with my kids all the time!?!? But how can I not at least try if I think I have a shot at giving them an advantage in their education? And, I do have to do something productive with my time, day in and day out, right? In a lot of ways pouring into my own kids seems like it has the potential to be a lot more rewarding than working some 9-5 job.
4) Very limited space in our house. The vision I have of homeschooling would definitely be easier to carry-out with a room for all the school stuff, spreading out projects, desks, etc, etc . . . . no idea what's going to happen with this one.

There they are, my pros and cons reduced to the simplest possible form in my mind. If you haven't read my "Disclaimer" post, you may want to.

Taking on my children's education is a huge responsibility; the weight of it overwhelms me. I do not doubt that I can give them a decent education. I want to give them the best possible education. I want to do the best I can in my part to help them live up to their God-given potentials and walk-out whatever grand callings and purposes He has for their little lives. If homeschooling is the plan, then with Christ all things are possible and I will be equipped as an educator and they will be equipped for their lives. So I guess it's not really doubts I fear but rather just the hard work!

Disclaimer

If I am to embark on this homeschooling journey, it will require all of my heart, mind, energy, and patience; especially patience. The hard work I foresee is daunting. Therefore, if it is to be, I must be absolutely convinced of the value of it and that it is the absolute best choice for my family. With this as my chief purpose, I will argue the benefits of homeschooling to myself; I will tout its superiority because I must be convinced that it is the best option for my family . . . . not necessarily for yours, and here is my disclaimer . . . . I am seeking to assure myself of this formidable path. I am also hoping to encourage any other parents who are or are considering homeschooling. I suppose I also want to somewhat present my reasoning to relatives and other secondary stakeholders who may think I'm crazy (and may be right). What I am not trying to do is say that homeschooling is what's best for every kid because I don't think it is. God created each child as a unique individual and placed them with the parents they are with purposefully. What's best for my family isn't necessarily what's best for yours; God didn't use cookie cutters.

I have the utmost respect for any parent who has seriously considered their child's education and made a conscious decision about what is best for that child, whatever it may be; as opposed to those parents who follow the path of least resistance with little or no thought and fail to recognize the immense stewardship entrusted to them. Furthermore, all any of us can hope to do is our best with what we've been given.

I have a deeper respect than ever for the homeschooling families I oversaw as an education specialist. It is not an easy thing to set-out to do what you believe is best for your family when it puts you and your kids in a minority. I am overwhelmed and struggling with whether or not this is what I am going to do and I have a professional life behind me and framed fancy pieces of paper on the wall in front of me that say this should be a walk in the park for me. I do not think these qualify me any more than anyone else who is seriously in pursuit of what's best for their kids but I would think (or wish) they'd give me some confidence! Why am I not more qualified? My own education, for the most part, taught me how to jump through hoops. It did not teach me any secret formulas for making schooling work. If anything it made me question trends and decide that there is no one way that works perfectly for everyone. Homeschooling parents who are sincere and willing to put in the hard work are qualified on the basis of knowing their child better than anyone else in the world and God giving that parent responsibility over that education (as He did every parent whether they choose to delegate or tackle it head-on).

So, next comes my list of pros and cons, which is looking something like this - Pros: great lofty hopes, subjective principles, research, beautiful sounding stuff. Cons: time, energy, patience, sanity, adequate space, nuts and bolts. Yikes! Both are important and other options I might consider would require both significant driving and significant money. Somehow this will all work out! Faithful is He who called and He also will bring it to pass!

What I Want

I want to send my kids to a school-type setting 1 or 2 short days a week. I want them to get the playground time with other kids and then maybe an art class and some other enrichment type activity. I want to do the core subjects on my own. This plan saves me from being with them 24/7. It gives them a taste of the good parts of school so they don't feel like they are missing out on something. Luke does feel this a little bit right now and that makes me sad. However, I feel a little bit better when I watch him play "school" with the rabbit. Floppy gets to hop freely around the house sometimes. He grabs her, sticks her in the little carrier cage, slams the door, and then laughs; lets her out, only to catch her again and repeat the same. I said, "I don't think Floppy likes that game" and he said, "Oh, we're just playing school."

Luke goes to a gymnastics class and Sunday school and by next year I'm looking to add another class or two to his life. I want him to have fun, learn from other adults, and work with other kids but I also think the core learning will happen best at home, as well at the tide pools, museums, library, grocery store, etc. I think if a school I was really excited about existed near our home I would consider it and I think it is possible I'll still decide on a school at some point in the future and drive for it.

I have started a list of my homeschooling pros and cons. I started blog-stormiong lots of topics I want to write about- mostly things that will make me re-examine, re-study, and remember the people and philosophies that got me so excited about homeschooling to begin with, details of which I can no longer pull together and articulate like I once could. My little starting point list of pros and cons is not ready to post and I think the reason is, I'm afraid of offending some random reader (not that I think my one-week-old blog has a big following or anything). None the less, there will probably be some sort a disclaimer post preceding my list post.